08 Wednesday Jul 2015
Posted in Heartbreak, Poetry
Tags
I said what about my eyes?
“Keep them on the road”
I said what about my passion?
“Keep it burning”
I said what about my heart?
“Tell me what you hold inside it?”
I said pain and sorrow
He said:
“Stay with it”
by Rumi
Picture Credit
Green Tara – Painting by Devendra Man Sinkhwal, Nepal
01 Saturday Nov 2014
Posted in Daily life, Death, Poetry
Tags
Alex Carr-Malcolm poet, Alexandra Carr-Malcolm, Alexandra Carr-Malcolm Lily, housework, Lily, love, Mother, mundanity, pain, poetry, UK poet, Uk poetry, writing, Yorkshire poet
I kick the dishwasher door shut
with my right foot.
Slam the mugs into their rightful place
without a backward glance,
click the washer onto spin.
Will it never end?
Then…
pulled up short,
a though occurs;
one day there will be no pots to wash,
no clothes to be done,
for you will be gone.
I fondly caress your fleece
slung carelessly across the chair,
and remove your work bag from the table –
to reveal the lily head, squashed,
beheaded, and hidden,
under mundanity
of housework.
© Lily 09.10.2014
by Alexandra Carr-Malcolm
Photo Credit: JamesDeMers Pixabay
24 Saturday May 2014
Tags
Alex Carr-Malcolm poet, Alexandra Carr-Malcolm, Alexandra Carr-Malcolm poetry, cancer, death, grief, heartbreak, hospice, loss, memories, Mother, Mum, pain, Peak District, poetry, sorrow, tears, UK poet, Uk poetry, Woodhead Pass, Yorkshire poet
I remember the daily grind through the Peaks;
from Hillsborough to hospice.
Morphine induced twilight hours,
brittle brown heather hair,
cascading watery cataracts,
crashing, weeping, winding.
I know each bend like the veins in my hand;
the outcrops and falling rocks.
Spray from the lorries,
thrown up, muddy teardrops,
sliding down the windscreen,
breaking limits, breaking hearts.
This is the road to hell.
© Death of a Minor 24.05.2014
by Alexandra Carr-Malcolm
Photo credit : photo credit: <a href=”http://www.flickr.com/photos/romeo66/2101025633/”>Romeo66</a> via <a href=”http://photopin.com”>photopin</a> <a href=”http://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nc-nd/2.0/”>cc</a>
14 Monday Apr 2014
Posted in Deep Stuff!, NaPoWriMo, Poetry
Tags
Alexandra Carr-Malcolm, grief, heartbreak, napowrimo, pain, poetry, UK poet, Uk poetry, Yorkshire poet
Do you know,
the other side of me?
Where the grass is greener,
and the soul is darker.
Do you know only,
my second face?
Not like the rest,
the one I keep for best.
Do you know,
if this is sunny side up
heads up, tales down,
turn that frown
upside down?
I think you know,
Little Miss Sunshine,
but have you met Judy
within or without?
Do you know,
the essence of me?
Not that of vanilla,
of sugar and spice,
but one of fear.
Do you know,
the other side of me?
Where the grass is greener,
and the soul is darker.
© The Other Side of Me 2012
By Alexandra Carr-Malcolm
Punch and Judy’s Carribean Vacation (Photo credit: _william)
23 Sunday Mar 2014
Posted in Deep Stuff!, Heartbreak, Longing & Waiting, Loss, Poetry, Waiting and Longing
Tags
Alexandra Carr-Malcolm, death, dreams, grief, heartbreak, longing, loss, memories, pain, poetry, sorrow, soul, UK poet, Uk poetry, Yorkshire poet
I’m hiding in the shadows,
it’s where I long to be,
drifting into dreamscapes,
singing sad soliloquies.
I have my other life, you see?
I’ve lived it since a child;
It’s not quite real – that I know,
but I’ve lived it for a while.
The daytime is the hardest,
a cruel life chased by death;
but night time is so easy,
sleep brings immortal breath.
What’s real, what’s not?
Well who’s to say?
Each one its own delusion,
by night the moon –
by day the sun –
each life is an illusion.
Shadows play upon my mind,
ghosts welcome setting sun;
silhouettes of dreams gone by
half-lives, loves-lived, undone.
So let me go, and leave me be,
to live each night anew.
I’ll sing my sweet soliloquies,
while dreams bring me to you.
© Silhouettes and Soliloquies 2012
By Alexandra Carr-Malcolm
The Eerie Cold (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
16 Sunday Mar 2014
Posted in Longing & Waiting, Loss, Poetry
Tags
Alex Carr-Malcolm Black Rose, Alex Carr-Malcolm poet, Alexandra Carr-Malcolm, Black Rose, death, grief, heartbreak, longing, loss, love, memories, memory, muse, pain, petals, poetry, Rose, UK poet, Uk poetry, Yorkshire poet
The last of the summer rays
blush gently on my cheek.
Tears fall like dew from the morning rose.
The flower blossoms,
the flower blooms.
Slowly it fades
as petals fall
one by one
the spirit
is gone.
I wear my heart upon my sleeve,
I also wear my rose.
Both are there for you to see.
The flower blossoms,
the flower blooms.
Slowly it fades
as petals fall
one by one
the spirit
is gone.
The last rose of summer cries.
The heart beats deathly slow.
The sun has set beneath the skies.
The flower blossoms,
the flower blooms.
Slowly it fades
as petals fall
one by one
the spirit
is gone.
© Black Rose 2012
by Alexandra Carr-Malcolm
black rose 1 (Photo credit: Melinda Taber)
26 Thursday Dec 2013
Posted in Poetry
Tags
Alexandra Carr-Malcolm, bed sit, Christmas, Christmas pud, divorce, grief, lodger, longing, loss, memories, memory, pain, poetry, Satsuma, UK poet, Uk poetry, Yorkshire poet
I am the festive lodger,
pushed from pillar to post.
Always someone else’s Christmas,
fake smiles to a congenial host.
I’m as shafted as the fairy,
stuck on an artificial tree;
outsider looking inwards,
mourning my family.
I am the bedsit teen Queen,
as I celebrate alone,
Satsuma tears and Baileys cheers,
and Christmas pud for one.
I open up your present,
somewhere you sip Champagne,
a cheap acrylic jumper,
and a card with misspelled name.
Noddy screams, ‘it’s Christmas!’
Sinatra croons away,
a miracle on 34th,
saved by Jonah’s cavalry.
I am your inconvenience,
you left when I was twelve,
destined to be a lodger,
condemned to festive hell.
© Satsuma Tears 11.12.2013
by Alexandra Carr-Malcolm
Christmas in the post-War United States (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
14 Saturday Sep 2013
Posted in Childhood Memories, Grief, Heartbreak, Longing & Waiting, Poetry
Tags
Alexandra Carr-Malcolm, death, grief, heartbreak, loss, love, Mother, Mum, pain, poetry, UK poet, Yorkshire poet
The clock struck twelve
and you were gone.
No family home,
I had no Mum;
why did you leave
me on my own?
You should have known,
I should have gone.
The days went fast
and slow, time passed;
but I was with you
at the last.
I often grieve
for what should be;
arm in arm,
just you and me.
©…and the Clock Struck Twelve 17.08.2013
by Alexandra Carr-Malcolm
The face of a W & H Sch grandfather clock at the Marines’ Memorial Hotel in San Francisco. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
17 Monday Jun 2013
Posted in Death, Deep Stuff!, Heartbreak, Longing & Waiting, Loss, Love, Poetry, Waiting and Longing
Tags
Alexandra Carr-Malcolm, death, dreams, Dublin, Dublin City, Grafton Street, grief, heartbreak, Ireland, longing, loss, love, memories, memory, pain, poetry, sorrow, UK poet, Yorkshire poet
Apologies for my lack of presence – I am very busy with work and a room refurb – I hope to be back soon!! Watch this space!
In the interim time, another oldie – one of my readers reminded me of this poem, it is one of my favourites!
I never went to Dublin,
or strolled along the shore.
I never walked on Grafton Street,
or wore the pearls you swore.
I never came to visit you,
and relive bygone days;
to welcome ghosts that haunted me,
or weep upon your grave.
© Dublin 2012
by Alexandra Carr-Malcolm
Grafton Street (Photo credit: National Library of Ireland on The Commons)
24 Friday May 2013
Tags
Alexandra Carr-Malcolm, confidence, keep calm and carry on, make do and mend, mantra, memories, mental health, pain, poetry, sorrow, tears, UK poet, Yorkshire poet
Please don’t be nice to me,
I don’t think I would cope,
I’d burst into tears,
and lose all my hope.
I’m back of the queue,
I’ve placed myself there,
I won’t move forward,
with my tunic of hair.
Throw me some praise,
and I’ll colour up puce,
I’ll duck and I’ll dive,
and it’s really no use.
I have my own mantra,
of make do and mend,
keep calm and get on,
I’m so good at pretend.
© Make Do and Mend 24.05.2013
by Alexandra Carr-Malcolm
English: Original copy of the Keep Calm And Carry On poster, in Barter Books, Alnwick, Northumberland (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
Worldly Winds 