01 Saturday Sep 2012
Posted in Deep Stuff!, Loss, Poetry
She looks in the mirror,
and stares in the glass.
Memories visual,
the haunting has passed.
Recalling events,
reflected in front,
and wonders quite simply,
when did I become?
© Becoming (her) 01.09.2012
By Alexandra Carr-Malcolm
Looking Glass (Photo credit: Elena Kalis)
23 Monday Apr 2012
Posted in Deep Stuff!, Longing & Waiting, Poetry, Worldly Winds
Tags
anger, bitter, death, heart, heartbreak, kiss, longing, loss, memories, memory, Mother, pain, tears
Bitter sweet, bitter Suite,
you break my heart again.
I gently hold you in my arms
try not to cause you pain.
This sweetness to be with you,
to see your face once more;
to cherish just one last sweet kiss,
before death slams the door.
Oh to be with you right now
to talk and laugh again!
For focus, love and clarity –
the calm before the pain.
You hold me tight and whisper,
but death clasps tighter still;
a grip around our fragile hearts,
it’s a bitter poisoned pill.
You try to look, you try to see,
but your eyes are not the same.
Could you even see me
when I screamed out your name?
The feeling of bewilderment
as you take your last breath.
You leave in anger, not in peace,
I can’t walk with you in death
Death claimed your heart, and you claimed mine,
you’ve gone where I can’t follow.
You’ve left me sad and broken down;
my heart is dead and hollow.
Bitter sweet, bitter Suite
the feeling’s still the same.
Life and death go hand in hand,
but the memories remain.
© Bitter Sweet, Bitter Suite 2012
By Alexandra Carr-Malcolm
Elizabeth Siddal was the model for Sir John Everett Millais’s Ophelia. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
21 Saturday Apr 2012
Posted in Longing & Waiting, Poetry, Worldly Winds
I don’t understand this situation,
too complex in secretive layers,
hidden in depths of memories,
memories we do not share.
You do not want me,
you don’t let me go.
I cannot read you,
you blow hot
and cold.
You left me bereft with a trail of tears,
falling like Diamonds in the dust,
dust of bygone days long gone
the Diamonds made of rust.
I have no tears to shed
For you, I have no
more tears to
cry – Good
Bye.
© Tears 2012
By Alexandra Carr-Malcolm
Teardrop on Fire (Photo credit: tj.blackwell)
15 Sunday Apr 2012
Posted in Deep Stuff!, Poetry
Don’t try to fix me
I am broken.
Don’t try to save me now
my day has gone.
I live in memories,
dreams half remembered.
I am damaged,
smashed and undone.
I tried to fix me,
glue back the pieces;
some bits were missing
and some went back wrong.
Cry for the memory
of what could have been.
Weep for the history,
mostly unseen.
Grieve for the dream
of opportunity lost;
to reach full potential –
that life has gone.
© Broken 2012
By Alexandra Carr-Malcolm
Jean-Baptiste Greuze – The Broken Mirror – WGA10658 (Photo credit: Wikipedia)
13 Friday Apr 2012
Posted in Poetry
Always watching – ever present,
never a moment of peace.
I long for the quiet,
the housewives dream;
no privacy, always eyes watching,
with a question or a request.
Leave me alone – let me be,
to read my books and write my words.
Let me listen to my music,
sad and soulful.
Let me sit in my garden
and watch the flowers
dance in the summer breeze.
Let me be -just for a while.
Stop watching, stop minding
and let me be.
Let me have my privacy.
Alone with my thought and memories.
Alone with my daydreams and visionaries.
Leave me in my solitude,
alone and in love with my dreams.
© Let Me Be 2012
by Alexandra Carr-Malcolm
11 Wednesday Apr 2012
Posted in Deep Stuff!, Poetry
Standing in the shadow of this mood
no longer ruler of my emotions;
visited by ghosts of a bygone age
I cannot shake the stardust from my eyes.
The silence is deafening.
The memories blinding.
With heavy heart and a trail of tears,
I dream the dreams from all those years.
The diamond flash of a smile or a look,
the scent of a memory.
What will be?
Will it be at all?
A roller coaster ride of life,
not knowing what to expect;
not knowing how I’ll react.
You see the sun, but inside I’m the moon;
do you not see the mask behind the veil of tears,
do you care or even contemplate the consequences –
of doing nothing?
© Standing in the shadow 2012
By Alexandra Carr-Malcolm
05 Thursday Apr 2012
Posted in Deep Stuff!, Longing & Waiting, Poetry, Worldly Winds
For my Mum…
I looked through the window,
I thought I saw you;
just a hint of a memory
that I wanted to view.
A past life once lived;
a deep memory pain.
I had to control myself
from calling your name.
Her walk was all wrong
and her hair, not the same,
but she had the same clothes
as I saw in my dream.
I followed behind her
and hoped to see
that it really was you
as you used to be.
I knew it was futile
and couldn’t be true;
you’ve been gone these six years,
it couldn’t be you.
© Mum 2012
Alexandra Carr-Malcolm 2012
06 Tuesday Mar 2012
Posted in Deep Stuff!, Longing & Waiting, Loss, Love, Poetry, Waiting and Longing
Tags
Alexandra Carr-Malcolm, dreams, haunted, heart, heartbreak, longing, loss, love, memory, pain, paramour, poetry, tears, waiting
Within my mind I see your face,
still haunted by the sound of your laughter,
recalling the warmth of your sweet embrace.
All these I carry within my heart.
See my head turn as I hear your name,
watch my heart break when you touch my dreams,
the tears that burn with the memory pain.
All these I carry within my heart.
My lovely, lovely, paramour.
© Paramour 06/03/2012
by Alexandra Carr-Malcolm
Worldly Winds 